Ash Wednesday Reflections: Did You Know There's Dirt on Your Forehead?

It's Ash Wednesday. If you're a Catholic, you know what that means. After you receive ashes you'll hear, "Did you know there's dirt on your forehead?" the rest of the day. That's not a bad thing.

Ashes are a reminder that we're called to let go of the things that keep us from God. Let go of hatred, anger and jealousy. Let go of valuing money, cars and other things of this world more than God. Let go of the things that won't matter in our eternal life.

As kids, many of us gave up candy for Lent and spent 40 days dreaming about the chocolate bunny that awaited us on Easter Sunday.

As adults, we focus more on giving up behaviors that keep us from being the children of God. Give up bullying and teasing. Give us gossip and name-calling. Give up greed and violence in all forms.

As kids, we held on tightly to our Easter baskets filled with candy and goodies. Our candy-filled baskets meant the end of our fast from candy.

As adults, we know that we are called to let the Paschal candle burn brightly in our hearts all year. As Christ is the light of the world, we are called to be light to those living in darkness. 

As kids, we dressed in our finest clothing on Easter morning as we headed off to church to celebrate the Resurrection of our Lord.

As adults, we are called to cast off the heavy cloaks that bind us to the past and to be reborn in Christ. We are called to walk in His light as children of God.

There's nothing wrong with choosing to give up things for Lent, but giving up candy, coffee, TV or Facebook is only a small part of the Lenten journey. We are also called to use prayer, fasting and almsgiving to bring us closer to God.

We are called to feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, clothe the naked, shelter the homeless, visit the sick, visit the imprisoned and bury the dead. In the Catholic faith, these are the Corporal Works of Mercy.

During our Lenten journey, we are called to cover and turn from the desires of this world as we walk toward the light that is Christ.

As kids, we often lamented, "It's not fair" as we dealt with the injustices in our everyday lives. As adults, we are called to feed the souls of those we encounter in our lives. The Spiritual Works of Mercy challenge us to admonish the sinner, instruct the ignorant, counsel the doubtful, bear wrongs patiently, forgive offenses willingly, comfort the afflicted, and pray for the living and the dead.

As adults, we are called to remember -- and to teach -- that Easter is about more than bunnies, eggs and candy. It's about the Risen Christ who gave His very life for us.

We are called to remember that our God is a God of hope and to let Him fill us with joy and peace so that we can live our lives in hope.

We are called to choose faith over worry, light over darkness, good over evil, trust over doubt and God's desires over earthly desires.

We are called to be grateful for what we have instead of complaining about what we don't have -- to bring sunshine into the lives of those we encounter.

 

We are called to let God's eternal love mend our broken hearts and to let Him make us into new creations in the Lord.

We are called to be who God meant us to be -- His sons and daughters who walk always in the light of Christ and who set the world on fire.

We are called to always remember that every day is a new day made by the Lord and to rejoice and be glad in it -- no matter what it brings.

We are called to let the joy of Easter morning burn brightly in our hearts throughout the year. We are called to take His light with us wherever we go, to let His light shine through our words and actions.

So, when someone tells you that you have dirt on your forehead on Ash Wednesday, thank them and tell the person that the ashes are a gift from God. Like the sacraments, the ashes of Ash Wednesday are an outward sign instituted by Christ to give grace. As you journey with Christ during Lent, let His light shine brightly in your heart and in your life. 

How Being a Mom Changed My Life

Like many moms-to-be, I read the books and took the classes. I was raised in a big family and also did some babysitting as a teen, so I thought I'd know exactly what to do when I became a mom.

March 15 will always be a special date in the timeline of my life; the day I became a mom. Life before motherhood was all about me, a night owl who liked to sleep late.

Then came Jenny, an early riser who woke up hungry for milk and mommy's embrace. From my oldest child, I learned selflessness. As a tiny infant, it was really difficult to keep Jenny awake to eat enough to fill her. She would doze off, then wake up crying again when I tried to put her back in bed.

Every time I look at my firstborn child, I remember sleepless nights followed by early mornings, the warmth of her skin against mine, the sound of her quiet breathing as she fell asleep in my arms, and the helplessness I felt when she cried and I couldn't calm her.

One of my fears when I was pregnant with my second child was that I wouldn't have enough love for both of my children. Jenny was a happy toddler who chatted constantly. We read books and played and she filled my time and my heart.

On March 21, three years and a few days after Jenny's birth, my second daughter Lauren was born. Lauren was an easy baby who woke up happy and rarely cried.

From my second child, I learned the math that every mom of more than one child knows -- that love divided quickly multiplies.

After Lauren was born, I often needed more than two hands. But I never needed more than one heart. My mom always said that she loved us all the same.

As a mom, the reality I learned from parenting two little ones is that you love each of your children as they need to be loved. Watching my girls interact filled me with love and joy.

I was tired all the time when I was pregnant with my third child. I worked midnight shift and slept in bits and pieces. During the daytime, I often volunteered at Lauren's preschool and Jenny's school.

On October 15, my son Jack was born. Jenny had turned 5 years old and Lauren had turned 2 years old in March. Life was busy -- how would I ever fit the needs of a new baby into our lives?

The girls doted on their baby brother. They wanted to do everything with him, even when he was way too tiny to actually play with them.

Full-time work and motherhood don't mesh well. There was always more to do than time to do it all. What I learned from my son is that the most important things in life aren't things. Kids grow up too quickly and parents need to make time to have fun.

I discovered a mom truth that my Mom learned years before me. A messy house is trumped by a warm spring day, beckoning us outdoors to play. Dishes in the sink aren't as important as playing My Little Ponies or Matchbox cars.

Babies grow into toddlers and teens as the years fly by at warp speed. Your little ones busy with ballet, soccer and preschool soon become middle school and high school kids busy with friends and activities. Blink your eyes and your kids have grown into adults.

When Kenny and I married, he was a package deal. Stephanie and Brian didn't grow inside of me, but they grew in my heart. Blended family life has its ups and downs, but life goes on and life is good.

When I look at my grown children, a part of me yearns for the busy days of their childhood. I wouldn't trade the memories for all the money in the world. My life was wrapped up in my kids and I'm so much richer for the gift of motherhood.

There are no words to describe what it's like to see your daughter holding her newborn baby. Being a first-time grandma is a little bit like reliving your parenting years. You aren't the boss this time around, but you already know how quickly the years go by and how precious each memory will be.

When you're a grandma, life is never boring. Seeing your precious grandchild enjoy new places and experiences is priceless.

Everything old really is new again when you're a grandma. A ho-hum day is brightened by a little voice whispering, "Grandma, you're the best" in your ear.

Like the birth of a second child, your heart expands when your second grandchild is born. You relive your baby's childhood through new eyes as you watch her parent her own baby.

The first grandchild may worry that a new grandchild means less love from grandma. What they don't know is that a grandma's heart -- like a mom's heart -- expands with love for each child.

Cousin love is a lot like sibling love. Sometimes they get along with each other and their love is easy to see, but other times they tease and squabble with each other.

And then there were three. A new baby granddaughter warms a grandma's heart. Sons and daughters each bring different gifts to the world and so do grandsons and granddaughters.

Life constantly marches forward. Time stands still for no man -- or grandma. Several years have passed since this Easter memory was made, but it still brings a smile to my face and warms my heart. For me, being a mom and grandma means that a part of my heart will always live outside my body.

Blogging Grandma Sandy, signing off for now.  

Portions of this blog post were originally published on Yahoo! Voices May 1, 2013

A Christmas Tree Walk Down Memory Lane

In the still of Christmas Eve morning, our Christmas tree brings light to the darkness. The tiny, brightly-colored lights twinkle and glow, symbolic of Jesus Christ, the Light of the World.


There's no unified color theme of red and gold, no movie theme with Disney princesses or Star War characters on our tree.


Each ornament on the Christmas tree holds a special meaning. Some celebrate the birth of a child or grandchild.


Some of the ornaments on our tree are reminders of trips taken to special destinations. Others are gifts from parents or siblings.


Among the most precious are those made with love by the little hands of our children or grandchildren.

There are many different ways to take a walk down Memory Lane. The scent of cookies baking, a few notes of a familiar melody or the taste of a longtime favorite meal all bring back memories of the past.


Each year, I enjoy a walk down Memory Lane while putting up and decorating our Christmas tree.


Theme trees are beautiful and a favorite among adults of all ages. But the child in me yearns for the joy found in
lingering over each of my favorite ornaments as I relive the memories they stir inside me.


Although I don't remember my first Christmas tree, the moment is forever captured in time -- courtesy of my Dad;s camera.


I slept through the excitement of that first Christmas morning. Since I was one of those screamy babies, that's probably a good thing.

Later Christmas mornings brought me baby dolls, stuffed dogs, a typewriter and my first camera.


They say you can never go back home and it's true in many ways -- especially for those of us raised in military families.


Home was many places, none of which is currently home to any of our family members.

The house I called home before I married and moved to Virginia 40 years ago is no longer home to the Atkins family since Mom's and Dad's deaths in June 2014.


The tall Christmas trees of my childhood were replaced with tabletop trees in recent years, and family Christmas celebrations moved from my parents' home to my younger brother's house as our family's numbers outgrew space at Mom and Dad's.


As I stood looking at my parents' Christmas tree on one of many post-Christmas visits back home, the sparkly glass ornaments took me back in time to the Christmas celebrations of my childhood.


Many of the same ornaments that hung on the Christmas trees of my youth adorned the small tabletop trees of Mom and Dad's later years.

In a similar way, the Christmas trees of my children's younger years -- filled with handcrafted paper ornaments -- have given way to Christmas trees with a mixture of memories from our kids and grandkids. Ornaments made with pride by our grandchildren hang side by side with baby's first Christmas balls from our grown children.

The first Christmas trees of our blended family years were filled with questions.

Should we have a real or artificial tree?

Which ornaments would make the cut and which would stay in the boxes?

How and when would we decorate the tree?

And who would decide where to hang which ornament? 

As the years passed, kids helped decorate the tree or not, as time permitted. Some years, they chose favorite ornaments other years, nearly all of the ornaments fit on the tree.

This year's Christmas tree brings back memories of ballerinas and soccer players, 

tiny babies and little toddlers, 'tweens and teens and excited grandchildren. 

The joy and wonder of Christmas is mixed with the sadness and sorrow 

of Christmas without our parents, now all together in Heaven.

Kid-friendly ornaments and Nativity scenes hang side-by-side on the Christmas tree. 

The reason for the season, the birth of our Savior.

Tomorrow morning, the excitement of Christmas will fill the air as our younger grandchildren open gifts here while our older grandson and his parents celebrate Christmas in Ohio.

Across the country, some of the Atkins siblings will gather together, 

celebrating the joy of Christmas past and the treasure of time with family. 

Merry Christmas from our family to yours! May your Christmas be filled 

with joy, wonder and the gift of Jesus' presence in your life!